Well it has been a rough few weeks, and I haven’t really written about it here. Actually, mostly because I just have not had a lot of time to write. But especially because I am have had a very good week, I wanted to check in on the project skinny stuff.

When we last left our heroine (that’s me!), she was sick for the weekend and thus, had a big loss. She was nervous that the whole starvation diet that sickness threw her into would not make that loss a maintainable one for the next week. HOWEVER! She managed to maintain! No loss, just maintain. The NEXT week, however, had a friday lunch at a chinese buffet place, bunko hosted at her house, and a grilling event also hosted at her house. There was gaining. So what did our heroine do?!? First off, she’s going to stop refering to herself in the third person, because while it was fun at first, it’s becoming a pain in her ass.

I buckled down and WORKED, baby. The weigh-in after being a social butterfly was not a good one, at +5 lbs. I am happy to say that this morning, I weighed in at -4.5 lbs. YAY ME! Now, that is a little much to lose in one week, but honestly, I don’t care. I will take it, and I’m going to keep working my butt off. Seriously, I have like a 10 pound threshold that I need to cross. When I was doing this last year this time, I would get up to that 10 lb mark and then it was gain lose gain lose gain lose never getting anywhere until I tossed in the towel. Same thing in the spring. Getting past the 10 lb point is a major milestone for me, and I’m feeling good baby. Next week, I want to see the total loss to be TWELVE! That’s right, I thumb my nose at you, Halloween! I can do it anyway!

– amy misses project runway already.

i feel like there’s so much to catch up on when I don’t post for a while. and i have to have scads and scads of time in order to post “properly”. and then i get into a huge downward cycle because I don’t really have scads of time, and if i don’t detail how i spent each of my days in blissful ignorance of the internet and this website and blah blah blah then i’m a bad blogger person and who needs that kind of pressure?

So i’m taking this few seconds of time, and posting anyway! (the moral of this story is i need to post regularly!)

1. Ethan said on the way home today, “Do you realize that I can …” I don’t remember the rest of the sentence. I was boggling that he used “realize” correctly. The boy is four. Do you realize the boy is four? The mind boggles.

2. Jocelyn says “poop” for both peeing and pooping. She was sitting at the table eating dinner last night and announced that she was going poop. I doubted it, but thought the poop must be on it’s way. I finally convinced her to try sitting on the potty when I realized that she had probably peed while sitting at the table. We obviously need to work on differentiating between #1 and #2. It’s kind of funny because we’ve had no success in peeing on the potty whatsoever, but she’s managed to poop a couple of times. This is the exact opposite of how it worked for Ethan, who was in underwear and peeing in the potty with ease, but would not poop anywhere except in his diaper, at naptime or in the morning before the nighttime diaper came off.

3. Because Jocelyn was sitting on the potty, all of a sudden Ethan realized that HE needed to go, and I told him he’d have to go upstairs. So off he went, and after I gave up on Jocelyn, I went up to check on him (I was feeling pretty frazzled and spoke curtly to him, so I wanted to make sure he was doing all right). He was sitting on the toilet and he asked me to stay with him so I sat on the edge of the tub while he pooped.

“Sometimes the poop comes right out Mommy. Sometimes it doesn’t though. If it doesn’t come out, even after you wait a bit, then you have to poop hard. I can poop REALLY hard, mommy. I’m a great hard pooper.”

Sometimes you just hear yourself say things like, “You sure are, you are a fantastic pooper.” before you even realize it. And then you sort of float up above yourself and look down and laugh.

4. After the non-pooping on the potty last night, when we got Jocelyn up this morning, she was poopy. She had pooped in her diaper sometime during the night. ARGH.

5. I was sick over the weekend. I’m doing much better now, but Friday night I went to bed with that feeling that I was not going to be healthy the next day. And sure enough, I was not. It was just a cold, but it was a cold from hell. I spent the morning on the couch, but then moved back upstairs to bed and dozed off and on the rest of the day with about 50 lbs of blankies on me. Poor James had to entertain the kids, direct the carpet cleaners, entertain the kids some more, and get them all into bed, because I was pretty much out of it. Sunday there was much less fever, but a pounding headache still most of the day along with the sore throat and weird high stuffed up sinuses (the nose was clear, it was higher up. I know that sounds weird. I can’t explain it any better except think behind the eyeballs/cheekbones.)

5.5 Getting our carpets cleaned was the best $100 bucks we’ve ever spent. We are so doing this every 6 months. I am kicking myself for not doing it sooner. James wanted to. I held back. I have no idea why. Because I am INSANE. James, you were right. So, so right. I was so very very wrong. Hold this over me at your leisure, for years and years to come. OH JOYOUS CLEAN CARPETS!

6. The only good thing about being sick is not worrying about WW points. in fact, on saturday i was afraid from time to time i was going to lose the small bits of food i did eat. Monday’s weigh in showed a loss of 3.5 lbs, for a TOTAL loss of 10.5 lbs. While it is cool to have hit that 10 lb milestone, I know it’s because of the near fast for Saturday and Sunday.. and that means that I probably just lost muscle, which is never good. I’m not sure what this will mean for this week. Does the body try to compensate? Will it go into starvation mode and save every little thing I eat? I guess we’ll see. I will be happy if I merely maintain this week, though of course, having a loss will be nice too. So… I guess I am cautiously enthusiastic. I am out of the 260s! That is cause for celebration! I want to STAY out!

7. work is very busy. I am so behind on blog reading lately. I *think* i’m caught up on people I actually know (have actually met in real life) but the rest of my blogroll is woefully neglected. maybe tomorrow night I can read through it. I love reading blogs, so it will be nice to settle in for some reading.

8. Craftiness has turned to crocheting. I bought the sweetest little crochet dress pattern, and am crocheting it for the little lady expected in this household sometime in February. I thought when I bought it, that it would take a while, but it is going surprisingly fast. I think I’ll be done this next weekend. I would like to learn how to knit. I went to a knitting group tonight, taking my crochet project with me, and I must say, the knitting talk was fairly intimidating. I can’t wrap my head around how knitting actually WORKS. Crocheting is very easy to understand (at least in my mind) but knitting is a complete mystery. Guess we’ll see, after this crochet project. The ladies at the group were great. It’s too bad they meet on days when James is usually in class. Today he had off, I think because of Columbus day. maybe next semester he’ll have Tuesdays off and I can go regularly. I need one closer to home though. Time to look around. Maybe start my own?

9. Monday I had off, and I met James and Kurt for lunch. where I realized, that the dull throbbing headache I had ( and had the day before, and the day before ) was probably NOT a result of the illness invading my body. It was actually caffeine withdrawal. Last week I realized the diet coke situation was getting out of hand (i’m ashamed to say how much I was consuming) and cut down drastically. Monday, I sat in the restaurant looking at James and Kurt’s caffeinated beverages and it struck me like a 24 case of Diet Coke, that gee, maybe this headache was from the no caffeine! When my body is used to getting it! Daily! I mused on whether Day 3 of no caffeine would be near the end of the withdrawal symptoms, or maybe only halfway through, and maybe I should push through the withdrawal symptoms, but after deliberating on it through the rest of the meal, I decided I didn’t care because I don’t actually want to give it up, just cut it down to a normal amount. So, I got a diet coke right as we were finishing up. It had a lot of ice, and it was a normal sized glass, so probably about 8 oz of DC in there.

And by the time I got home, my headache was gone.

10. I’m totally swimming around in the gloriousness of NewsRadio on DVD from Netflix. The cast was so good. the writers were so good. the show was SO FUNNY! I love every character on that show. It’s so rare to find an actual FUNNY ensemble cast. usually it’s got a few stars, and then supporting cast members. I keep thinking of WKRP, which my mother loved when I was little, and as a result, I’ve seen every episode (multiple times!) – that was another great ensemble cast. Another one – Coupling on the BBC. Definitely check that one out. I still hold that it is the funniest thing that is/has been on TV. EVER!! but yeah, love me some NewsRadio. And the commentaries are pretty insightful as well.

OK. I’m done. That was much longer than a few seconds. And I think I even got out all that has been on my mind. It feels so good to just have a good mind vomit!

-amy just lets the wookie win.

THE WEEKEND

was wonderful. The lovely Linda came down for the weekend and much was discussed. I held her hostage, forced her to cut halloween decorations and trace dollie patterns, working her like a slave with only gruel & water butternut squash risotto and beer in exchange. And then I FORCED her to sit out in the sun on our deck and read the paper. The news of our executive branch of government alone could have killed her. I AM BRUTAL!

THE KIDS

are cute as punch. I can’t think of any stories now, except perhaps when Ethan asked Daddy to color something in on the kid’s menu at Bertucci’s. When Daddy declined, Ethan heaved a sigh as if to say, “Oh bother, why can’t ANYONE DO WHAT I ASK THEM?!!! OH THE HORROR!” ok so i did think of a cute story.

THE WEIGH IN

was a success with another 1.5 lbs gone. I am scared. I know I thought that it was hard getting back into this, but if you’ve been reading this blog, or the archives at all, you will have seen a trend. A trend of me being ALL GUNG HO! I CAN DO IT! YAY ME! and then petering out around, hmm… when was it?? OH RIGHT, RIGHT ABOUT THIS POINT IN THE JOURNEY. I don’t wnat that to happen. I AM NOT GOING TO LET THAT HAPPEN. I *think* that I’ve had a couple hard weeks in the last month, but I know I’m heading striaght into the place in my head where I am really going to want to just toss in the towel. I need to keep my game face on. I HAVE to keep my head in the game. NO COMPLACENCY. Just because I made it this far (gee, a whole 7 lbs) doesn’t mean that I can relax, because apparently, whenever I relax, I lose my willpower.

I have not yet begun to fight!! BRING IT ON!

Um….

But not too much. K?

THE WORK STUFF

I am coming up on my 1 year anniversary at work, and was idly wondering about the usual evaluation/review stuff that goes on. So I looked it up on the HR site and found out I was supposed to have one halfway into my 6 month probation period (never happened). And that they don’t do them on the employee’s anniversary date, but in jan or july, depending on that anniversary date. Soooooo… to make a long story short, I was supposed to be reviewed in July, and so I’ll probably be reviewed sometime this month to make up for it, and if I get a raise it will be retroactive to July.

I’ve already spent it in my head on booze and hos.

THE TV STUFF (no spoilers, just for you Hilly! Even though you’re probably caught up by now)

I JUST NOW watched last week’s project runway. I was DYING with anticipation. OMG I love that show. I can’t wait to see the reunion show this week. We also watched the 2 new episodes of The Office. Excellent. Love love love that show. Still need to watch Gilmore Girls, which I just can’t bring myself to watch because I know it will make me so sad – I may build up a few shows so that I can watch them all in a row and hopefully end on a happy note. Also need to watch Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. Love Aaron Sorkin. Own the Sports Night (GO PUT IT ON YOUR NETFLIX LIST!) DVDs. West Wing was awesome until Sorkin left. this is probably our most anticipated show this season.

And that’s really it as far as our/my tv watching goes.

Um. this was supposed to be quick and short. I’m off to bed.

-amy tosses salt over her shoulder.

so. hi there. project skinny! thought i fell off the wagon, didn’t you? well, you’re right, and you’re wrong. i have been meaning to post since monday, but it’s been a busy week and i had other stuff i wanted to say (puzzles?! puzzles were SO important?? You just HAD to share your precious handmade totoros??) (Oh shoosh, inner self.)

So I did not post anything for week 3, and am terribly late here posting about week 4. But I have NOT fallen off the wagon, though I have been a bit discouraged. Last weekend was a Not Good Points weekend. I had Bunko friday night, and it was filled with booze and taquiros and booze and chips and booze and trail mix with m&ms and more booze. And then some more booze. Saturday night we actually had a SITTER for the first time in months, and had fried bar food before the movie and then mexican after the movie and why is it I always seem to think mexican will be ok? Because the big bowl of (fried) chips and the yummy food with cheese and sour cream and quacamole and all sorts of yumminess, well, that can’t be good, and I can never guesstimate what the points would be but I know that they’re probably high (even without the guac. and the sour cream, which I did NOT have). I actually think I did ok at the mexican place, compared with bunko and the fried bar food. But it all added up for a very disappointing weekend, and a gain at monday’s weigh in.

So I did not count it! I told James I was just going to NOT weigh in, and just weigh in the next week (this week). He claimed that was cheating. Which may be. But I don’t care if it’s cheating if it means that I don’t get SO frustrated that I just throw in the towel. Mind games. It’s what’s for dinner! How Can We Trick Your Mind Today! Now, with Lemon Fresh Scent!

So anyway, I did not “officially” weigh in last Monday, but I pretty much step on the scale every morning so I knew what the damage was, and it wasn’t pretty. However, by this last monday (which was week 4 weigh in) I was back on track with a 1/2 lb. loss from week 3. (Which means that even though I gained week 3, i lost it all as well as 1/2 a lb in week 4. yay me.)

I have to say, it has been a hard couple weeks. week 4 after my set back was especially hard. It was a lot like week 1, where you SEE ALL the stuff that you want and shouldn’t have but still WANT WANT WANT. Week 2 it was like, “I see you! But I don’t need you no sirree bob! I’m just fine! Ha-HA!” Well, week 3’s weekend kicked my ass to the curb and when I saw all that stuff, it was like pressing my face to the window staring and not being able to look away and wanting to lick the glass — that’s how hard it was. But I managed it. I didn’t succumb to unplanned stuff, but did plan many many things that made it easier. there were much brownie snacking (3 pt brownie bites from costco, i love you) and even planned peanut m&ms (6 pts never tasted so good) and so it made it easier to steel myself against the BOX OF DOUGHNUTS IN THE KITCHEN AT WORK. HOW DARE THEY. Ahem.

So this week has been a lot easier, in fact, I think there have been a few days I’ve been under points, which isn’t too good because your body can trigger into starvation mode, and then it’s REALLY a hard to shed pounds. but still. Under points? Me? WHO IS THIS AND WHERE DID YOU PUT AMY??! It really is kind of shocking.

So the moral to the story? I need to persevere with the points counting even on the weekends, because that is where I get into trouble. At work, it’s easy to keep track and not really stray off the planned eating, but at home, the kitchen is ALWAYS right over there! Waving to me! Hi Amy! Come have some chips! Come rummage around in me! I’m full of food! And what with the onset of cooler weather, I have been getting all these nesting crafty sewing BAKING urges. We had some bananas that were on the brink of super-bad, but just at that stage where they make wonderful banana bread, so of course I did. and then I ate about 6 of them over the weekend. However, I realized what I was doing, COUNTED THEM, and took the remaining muffins (i made them into muffins instead of loaves for easier points figuring out) over to my neighbor Selena so she and her husband could enjoy them and they would be OUT of my house.

So that’s the Project Skinny update. I remember thinking how nice it would be to be in the 250s instead of 260s by the end of the month. I don’t think that is going to happen, but I think I will be pretty close 🙂

THE ART OF THE SCALE

Weigh-in: 263.5 I am down 2.5 lbs. That is for a total of 5 lbs. HOORAY! Now, I don’t know how “true” this was, because I didn’t have my glasses on. When I can actually see, I step on the scale, and it kind of hovers around several numbers, usually within half a lb or two, and then LOCKS on whatever number is showing after 1 second, and that’s what it decides is “the” number.

This means that if you step off, and step back on again, you might get a different number. You have to stand very still and watch and see what is going on. With no glasses on, the LED on my scale is just an unreadable blur and I just had to hold very still, wait a few seconds, and then hop off and crouch down to see what it said.

It could have been hovering around 264, or even 264.5 and then blipped down for a second when I breathed in (or out) or some tiny shift of my balance affected the reading.. I don’t know. But I DO know that when I saw the number I was very pleased, and so I am TAKING it and not asking questions 🙂

Five pounds. This is great. I have to say, that the second week has been a lot easier than the first. The impulsive urges to just pick up that muffin near the register in the cafe were nearly OVERPOWERING the first week, and the second? What muffin? Where? Didn’t even see it. Weekends are definitely harder, but saving a lot of flex points for the weekend helps a good bit.

Here’s to week three!

SCHOOL’S OPEN HOUSE

Sunday afternoon was pleasantly filled with various activities. Ethan spends “naptime” nurturing the budding architect within by shunning his bed and building all varieties of creations out of his wooden train tracks or maybe his blocks. Jocelyn sometimes sleeps, but didn’t on Sunday. I heard her over the baby monitor singing and laughing and reading books, and finally, a loud THUMP! and then the loud, crying of a toddler who was not just crying to milk out every vestage of sympathy possible, but the loud insistent wailing of someone who is actually hurt. I nearly dropped my laptop on the floor in my flight up the stairs to her room, where sure enough, she was laying on the floor, apparently having fallen while trying to climb over her bed rail.

She wasn’t TOO hurt though (probably just more scared) because when I picked her up, she said through her tears, “I want to come downstairs Mommy!” (not, “ow” or “I have a boo-boo” or “I need a band-aid” or “I FELL!!” just “I want to come downstairs!”)

Since everyone was so SOLIDLY, DECIDEDLY awake, we decided to head over to the kids’ school’s annual open house.

Ethan’s teacher told us that Ethan is very smart, and has a very strong character. She added that he tries very hard, which was all EXACTLY the right things to say to us, and we were very proud of our boy. We spent some time playing with all his favorite toys, which SURPRISINGLY, all seemed to match the transportation or architect theme. Oh, or puzzles. The boy LOVES puzzles. I was especially excited, when we sat down at a table with paper and crayons, when Ethan decided to draw “our house!” by himself, with minimal involvement from me. “First draw a line up. Then over. Then down. Now the roof. Can you draw a door? How about a window?” Whenever Ethan decides he wants a picture of something, he normally hands one of us the paper and crayon and demands that we do it for him, no matter our arguments that “we’ll help, YOU can do it!”

My baby’s first drawing of a house. Next stop, college. Sniff.

Jocelyn was quick to show us the bin filled with My Little Ponies “Here’s the mommy, and here’s the baby!” and was sweeping busily in a corner when it was time for us to go. I mentioned to her teacher how we’ve been really cracking down on any whining, “I Waaaaaant a DRIIIIIIINK!” “Ask nicely.” “May I have a drink please?” “SURE!” and was excited (and stunned, actually) to hear that she doesn’t whine too much at school. However, she does say, “LEAVE ME ALONE!” which she says at home as well. I explained that unfortuately, she got that from her brother, who says that to her entirely too often, and instructed them to definitely not tolerate that sort of attitude because we certainly don’t.

Overall, the visit to the school went well, and then we were off to our next destination, Tamara and Andrew’s, where we dropped off a crib mattress and a pack and play. “You sure you won’t need it?” Tamara asked.

“Nope. Not unless something goes dramatically astray!” I replied.

STILL AFRAID OF ANY TOILET OTHER THAN HIS OWN

Since we were in the area, we called up Ann and Kurt to see if they wanted to risk life and limb and have dinner with us and the kids. I joked that eating with the whole family will be like an additional dose of birth control. Feel the need for babies? Oh just have dinner with us, and you can stave off that feeling for easily, another 2-3 years! I don’t know how it looked to them, but the kids actually did fairly well, with Jocelyn only trying to escape from the high chair a few dozen times at the end, and Ethan behaving remarkably well. The tale of How Dinner Went might have an ENTIRELY different perspective from their side of the table of which I am totally unaware! Hee hee!

But I digress.

We drove around a bit before heading to the restaurant so as not to get there too early, and Ethan started showing concern about what was going on.

“Where are we going?”

“We’re going to drive around a little bit and then go to the restaurant and have dinner with Kurt and Ann. Look a caboose!”

“Yeah. Sure. Caboose. Um, I don’t want to go to the restaurant. Let’s drive around and then drive HOME.”

“Well, then we will be hungry. We’re going to have dinner at the restaurant. Don’t you want some dinner? They might have PANCAKES!”

“I don’t want dinner. I’m not getting out of the car. So THERE. Humph.”

This went on the entire (short) drive.

When we got to the restaurant Ethan REALLY started acting up. He started to pitch a fit over nothing – he wanted MOMMY to get him out of the car and not Daddy, and he wasn’t going to get out unless MOMMY got him out.. James and I were starting to get pretty testy with him until I saw how he was crossing his legs.. I thought it was to prevent James from touching the buckle (because he wanted me to get him out, not James) but then I realized what it was.

The boy had to pee, and was afraid of being forced to go to the bathroom in the restaurant’s bathroom. I tried to make it as casual as possible, and at the same time alleviate this fear, by saying, “Do you need to go potty? Maybe you could water the grass.” And sure enough, all of a sudden the attitude dropped and he and Daddy found a protected area and he did some business.

Ethan has a major phobia of strange toilets, as you can tell from all the photos I posted from vacation of Ethan’s bare buttocks while he “watered the grass”. Sometimes I try to help him push his comfort level a bit, but this time, I could tell that he was really really worried about it. Jocelyn and I went in and got a table, and when he and James arrived in the restaurant, the surly defiant attitude was gone.

I wonder how much longer before foriegn bathrooms are acceptable. Because while peeing in the bushes is (kind of) OK for a 4 year old, I think the clock is ticking on that one.

– amy conquers strange toilets with ease, is conquered by strongly scented bathrooms, alas!

ps – I’ve not forgotten about Saturday, but damn, I can only write so much (and so often) and expect you to listen, so later it will have to be.

It has been a hard week. A very difficult week. But I have made it, and have the fruits of my labors in a 2.5 lb loss! Yay me!

I hope everyone has a lovely Labor day weekend. We did, although with all the rain we’ve gotten we’ve spent most of it indoors and by Monday night, the kids were really stir crazy. They started RACING around and around the house and James and I just laid back and let them, because all that energy has to go SOMEWHERE.

Today they started school again, Jocelyn in the “Yellow Pony” class and Ethan in the “Red Heart” class. James reports that Ethan sailed into his classroom with nary a glance backward, but Jocelyn had a little more trouble. Which is weird, because it’s the same classroom she goes to every morning, and even had some of the same teachers she usually sees. They both have new teachers, but there are still plenty of familiar faces around so it is a little surprising that she had a tough morning. I hope tomorrow is better.

We’ve had a nice summer.

Vacation is over. The kids start the official preschool (this week is just open daycare) next Tuesday and James starts school this week. He took the summer off from classes, and it has been NICE. Now that it is over, and we’ll go back to 2 days a week not really seeing him in the evenings, I can REALLY appreciate how nice it has been over the summer.

It has gotten me thinking about the things I want to do though. First off, once again, back on the Weight Watcher’s bandwagon. This summer has pretty much been crappy, although I’m happy to say that squinting down at the scale this morning, I was relieved. I could have gained 15 lbs (especially considering the fabulous food we had on vacation, and ice cream every other night) but still seem to be hovering at 265. OK, 268.5, to be exact. Can I tell you how hard it is to actually post real live numbers here? It is hard. However, looking at me, you’d know I am grossly overweight, so really, who am I trying to kid. So, skinny page is going back up (I took it down a while ago). Project Skinny back ON, baby.

As a way to try to keep myself on track, I’m starting a new page on the side, where I’ll be tracking what I eat along with points values and exercise. I went grocery shopping yesterday and bought a lot of stuff that will help me stay on track – I know from experience that a big part is to get RID of stuff that is going to tempt me, and keep stuff around that will be good for me. I was going to make my lunch today, and for the week, but didn’t get to it yesterday, so I’m going to try to do that tonight. Subway will be my friend today at lunch.

I also would really love to learn more about photography. I’m debating whether or not to take a photography class from NOVA, or take the Canon 20D/30D PhotoSafari thingee next month. Maybe I could do both.

I also want to take a sewing class. I have very basic skills from 8th grade home ec, and as I look at some projects I would like to do, I think I’d like to take a beginning sewing class to see what exactly I don’t know. G Street Fabrics has a few – anyone else know of a place that offers beginning sewing?

And this is kind of out in left field, but I would like to take a basic carpentry class. This is one that I am not interested in doing right away, but maybe sometime next year I could find and take a class. I think it would be interesting. Right now, my interests lay more in the sewing/crafty projects than the wood projects though. Someday.

I’m looking forward to fall. I’m so glad it has cooled down, although it could still come down another 10 degrees and I’ll be happy. Ethan will also be excited – that boy LOVES to wear pants and long sleeves. I brought along his favorite long pants/sleeves outfit in case we met up with a chilly day on our vacation, and on our way home from the Pequot Native American Museum last Thursday, it was raining cats and dogs. Despite James running for the car and pulling it up in front, we all got soaked (although, not as soaked as James). So when we got back to the yellow house, I pulled those clothes out of my bag* for him and he SQUEALED in delight. Then he wanted to sleep in them that night. Then he wanted to wear them the next day. We compromised and said he could wear them the next day IF it was cool enough and IF he put jammies on for the night and he was in heaven.

* I had to put them in my bag, because if he had seen them, if he had even been AWARE of them, he would have wanted to wear them and would have thrown a fit to have them and our entire vacation would have been RUINED! RUINED I SAY! He just loves snuggly clothes. He gets it from me, I think. The number of times he has tried to convince me (in the middle of 100+ degree weather) that it would be FINE for him to wear pants to school is just funny. He will be so happy when I bring all of his long sleeved stuff down from the top shelf in his closet.

– amy forgot her headphones this morning. First mornings back to work suck. Especially with no head phones.

You may or may not have noticed, that since my big “THIS IS IT!” post and then the following week update, I havne’t really posted any project skinny updates.

That’s because I wasn’t being very good.

But this week, I have really buckled down, and have surprised myself with how well I have been doing.

IT IS HARD! But I have been having a pretty good week!

I had a little bit of a touch and go moment Thursday when I was really jonesin’ for some Pad Thai, but Ann, bless her heart, came through for me with some IM perspective:

raine: ann!
raine: i want to go get thai so bad!
raine: but it’s like a zillion points!
raine: ahhhhhhh!
miniann: how badly do you want thai?? bad enough that you’re willing to not lose weight or even gain weight this week over it?
raine: NO!
raine: i’m trying to see if there’s something “good” i could get instead
miniann: lol
miniann: yeah, thai makes that very hard.

She really hit the nail on the head, and honestly, that is what has been keeping me together and helping me make good choices all week – I want to see a loss. That is it, plain and simple, this is it, this is my life, and it’s time to pony up with some changes!

So now that you’re all, “you go girl!” and “You can do it” and “woo to the hoo!” Let me tell you that I totally blew it today.

Today was a good friend’s last day at work, so we all went out for a farewell lunch.

At a chinese restaurant.

And it was buffet.

GAH!

Yes, there were many things consumed that were NOT good for me. I can try to placate myself with the fact that there were some changes in the way I would have done it before, like only a teeny bit of General Tso’s, my favorite, and also a bajillion points and more of the brocoli beef, but honestly, it was still not a stellar meal.

However, I know that this is not it, I still have, not only the REST of the day, but the rest of teh week! It is going to be hard, because I tend to eat when I’m at home, and that makes weekends the worst, but I can do this 🙂 I want to see a loss this week SO BADLY, so I am just going to keep holding on to that all weekend.

And possibly go stock up on the 3 for 1 pt no sugar added popsicles. Great for when you get hit with that nervous eating urge.

So, not only have I been doing good with the eating, but I have been making a few other minor changes

Every morning my alarm goes off early so that I COULD actually get up, go downstairs and work out before hitting the shower and heading off to work. Every morning, that never happens. But one morning, as I was laying there thinking about how I really didn’t want to groove it to an exercise tape, it did occur to me that I could maybe go for a short little bike ride.

I didn’t hop up and go. I saw you thinking that is where this was going, so HAHAHAHA, oh that’s funny, no, I rolled back over and slept until the alarm went off again. BUT, I did hop on my bike that evening and had a pretty good, fairly strenuous little ride on a beautiful little trail by the creek. It was about 30 minutes, nothing stellar, but I felt great, and it was great to be out in the fresh air. (Not great to inhale gnats though, I learned how to avoid those pretty early on.)

Another little change – started just climbing the stairs instead of taking the elevator when I get to work. I’m on the 3rd floor, and they count the ground floor as floor 1, so it’s not a huge amount of stairs, which is good, or I wouldn’t do it. But it’s a step in the right direction, and I’m feeling pretty good about it.

So! Just gotta stay really strict with myself this weekend, and no matter what I see on the scale monday, keep hold of this will power that seems to have strayed into my head.

– amy was a fool, she was petrified, she never thought that she could live without you by her side

So, I tried out this new sub from subway, but was dismayed that they didn’t have the nutritional info on their website.

So I emailed them, and they emailed me back this info:

6″ Tuscan Chicken Sub

Calories 390
Total Fat 8 grams
Cholesterol 60 mg
Carbohydrates 54 grams
Fiber 5 grams
Sugar 13 grams
Protein 29 grams

The Nutritionals include bread (Italian White), chicken, grilled peppers and onions, lettuce, tomatos, tuscan seasoning, tuscan vinaigrette and American cheese.

I know you were wondering about this. I live to serve you.

Hi.

How are you?

Good? Good, good.

Me? Oh, I’ve been better.

—–

Why is it I always seem to answer these sorts of things like this? My friend Selena was walking her dog while I was out watering my wee newly planted flowers, and that is pretty much how the pleasantries went, and she kind of eyed me and then I realized that I ALWAYS seem to answer this way.

Something for the therapist couch I guess. Oh wait. I don’t have a therapists couch. That means it’s something for the blog, which is HERE! Hee hee!

Project skinny took a dive the last two days. Partly due to time, but mostly because I got all cocky. Monday was a disaster of an eating day that I really am embarassed to even tell you about. I kept thinking, “It’ll be ok because I’ll have a salad for dinner.” But then when dinner time rolled around, I was driving to get a bed for my daughter, and so it became fast food. And did I choose the grilled chicken sandwich w/ no mayo that virtually every fast food place has and is actually not too bad for you? No, I got the gordita combo at taco bell, 2 gorditas and a taco. Plus, more diet coke.? My blood was running with caffeine on Monday.

Tuesday was no better. Stayed at home because a handyman was coming to fix our bird-in-the-dryer problem, and when I’m at home, I never eat good. It’s just all too accessible!

Wednesday wasn’t actually too bad. Went to California Tortilla for lunch, and while I love them with every fiber of my being, eating a burrito there is basically a zillion points, but breakfast was good, and I was still pretty full at dinner time so only had a wee bit, so I think it was ok.

BTW, yesterday was FREE POP TART DAY! at California Tortilla. I hope you got yours! I got mine! And had a taste before James confiscated it. Sniff. Please click on that link. And scroll down for the cartoon at the bottom. It is funny.
Back to project skinny. Do you sense what I’m not telling you? Yes, I haven’t been keeping track, except in my head. Big no no.

So today, it’s down to business. I’m happy to say that yesterday I at least drank (what felt like) my own body weight in water, so I had that going for me. I think the stress of last week caught up to me, because my body is sending me that taunting “you’re going to get siiiiii-iiiiiiick!” feeling and it doesn’t feel like the kind I can head off at the pass with lots of water and turning in early tonight.
The week was shaping up fairly stress free until Tuesday afternoon came and with it, a call from Ethan’s school. A call about his unacceptable behaviour, and how he was sent to the office. A call where I could hear him in the? background, grunting loudly, shouting, “LEAVE ME ALONE!” and “I HATE YOU!” and other non acceptable things.

Nothing can turn a good mood into a crappy mood and fairly stressed out mood like that sort of phone call.

Wednesday was much better, but James and I both were edgy and worried all day long. And now, I have got that scratchy throat feeling and my ears feel weird when I pull on them (don’t ask why I was pulling on them, I can’t remember).

OK, that’s enough. My goal for next month (i’m starting early) is to not: Not write for days at a time, and then write enough words to blind someone trying to read it in one sitting. Not good, Amy, not fun. We want our readers to keep their sight.

So on that note, before this gets obscenely long (blink),

GOOD BYE!